Ouch – My Life Doesn’t Fit!

Have you ever purchased a fabulous pair of shoes in the hope that they will eventually “stretch” and feel comfortable? You wear them a few times praying that they’ll feel better.  As much as you want to them to fit, they continue to pinch and rub your feet in the wrong places. Several blisters later, you limp back to the shoe store to return them or give them away.

Sometimes your life can feel like that pair of shoes that don’t fit. You may wake up one day to discover that the life you’re leading is no longer joyful and fulfilling.  A life changing event or transition may prompt you to question whether your life matters.  You’ve outgrown your life.

That’s what happened to me at age 38 when I realized that I was trying to squeeze myself into a professional role and lifestyle that wasn’t right for me.  As a young attorney I had leaned into my career, returning to work soon after my son was born.    Like so many women of my generation I was striving to “have it all” and dismissed my discomfort about having a nanny raise my son as classic “working mother’s guilt”.  In my late 30’s it began to fall apart.

I was working in my “dream job” (that fabulous pair of shoes) in a big national law firm, which required that I work 60-70 hours per week.  Although I didn’t feel comfortable devoting virtually all my time and energy to my career, I tried to squeeze myself  into a workplace culture and lifestyle that wasn’t the right fit for me.  When I finally woke up to the fact that I had virtually  “outsourced” the parenting of my son to the live in nanny, I realized that, in my late thirties, I was still living the values of my twenty five year old self.

This led to a period of intense soul searching during which I got clear about my values, purpose and what brought me joy.  Once I was clear about my priorities, I crafted a new vision for a life that fit who I was and what I valued. After eight months of exploring new possibilities, I stepped into the life of a home-based entrepreneur with the freedom to design my life around what mattered most to me.

You’ve heard the expression – “if the shoe fits, wear it”.  If your life no longer fits who you are – “Reinvent it!”


Anne Martin, The Reinvention Mentor, is a Coach and Speaker who guides professional and business women to reconnect with their heart’s desire and re-design their lives for more joy, abundance and fulfillment. She is available for presentations and workshops on topics such as work/life balance, life reinvention and success. For more details, please visit www.daringreinventors.com.

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